A somewhat meaningful half-hour

This is a new year, but things still seem old. Things seem just the same as they were last year. My personal obstacles still stand before me, daring me to conquer them. I continue to think I want to be a writer, but my stomach tightens at the thought of logging into WordPress and writing in my blog.  What can I write about? Do I need a clearer direction? Am I getting anywhere? Where is this magical place called “anywhere” anyway?

I’m looking out the window at the snow-covered ground. Several sets of footprints litter the snow. People, whom I will probably never meet, have left their marks out there in front of the building. It seems that there is something poetic about the indentations that these people have left behind; something a little bit sad.

Life is still ordinary this year. I complete life’s necessary tasks. I eat, and I sleep, and I work, because I must. The snow outside the window is pure, white, and inviting. I picture myself outside making footprints, maybe as a means of participating.

The snow is still. The snow is quiet. It reminds me of  the world I lived in when I was a child. That world isn’t real anymore because I know too much now. I still have my innocence, but it’s tarnished. It doesn’t sparkle like it used to.

Is writing a way for me to make sense of the world? Writing allows me to ask questions, but it rarely gives me answers. Today I wrote about snow, and to do that I had to look at and think of the snow. I can say that today I sat down with myself, and for about a half an hour, I had a purpose.

My snow view

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One thought on “A somewhat meaningful half-hour

  1. Lol I like your title. Sometimes we have those days where we have no idea what it is we are going to say/write. Sometimes it can be because we have so much on our minds. Other times, it could very well mean that we must take the time to keep our mind still. I think what you did with this entry, was a nice way to start. Keep writing and you will begin to find answers to things you had no idea you had questions to. 😉 And yes I do agree, that when the year starts on January 1st, we do not feel any different than the day before. lol 🙂

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